STUART
SMALLEY GOES TO WASHINGTON
THE REAL AL FRANKEN IS CERTIFIED - AND CERTIFIABLE
By: Doug Schmitz
"After being isolated in the echo chamber of the
entertainment-media-academia complex where he got nothing but praise for decades, Franken
is quite unsuited for the world outside. He cannot tolerate criticism and
characteristically responds to it with over-the-top vitriolic attacks."
– Matthew Vadum, The American Spectator, June 30, 2009
As the Democrats in Congress – and in the mainstream media – celebrate
leftist loon and tax cheat Al Franken’s stolen victory from incumbent Republican Norm
Coleman, the rest of us are still recovering from nausea at the very thought of Franken as
a "valid" U.S. senator. After nearly eight tortuous months of refusing to
concede defeat to Coleman, Franken’s bully tactics finally paid off – thanks
mainly to George Soros and ACORN.
Known to his fellow deranged fans as Stuart Smalley – a psychotic, narcissistic
nerd from his Saturday Night Live glory days, Franken has not only perpetrated an
unprecedented travesty of justice by successfully stealing a legitimate election win from
Coleman, Franken going to D.C. is also the quintessential, colossal joke – an
otherwise obligatory punch line that will likely never escape David Letterman’s lips,
which have been securely fastened to the Left’s collective rear end since day one.
Had the Minnesota Supreme Court "selected" Coleman (as Dan Rather would have
likely phrased it on Letterman as he did with former President George W. Bush), the Left
would have declared it another Florida 2000, with Coleman becoming the premier, running
joke on Letterman. Despite the fact that Coleman is the actual, decent and honorable one
who rightfully won back – but graciously conceded – his senate seat to a raving
lunatic like Franken, as usual with the Left, cold-hard facts don’t matter, nor do
they take precedence in such sacred and privileged rituals as an American election.
After all, to declare Franken the winner of this patently fraudulent election, the
court had to forget about Franken’s political inexperience and ineptness, as well as
his questionable mental stability to even do the job.
Even more revealing, to declare Franken the winner, the court had to overlook
Franken’s blatant tax evasion of $70,000, which includes interest and penalties, in
at least 17 states (which would certainly make current Treasury Secretary Timothy
Geithner’s $34,000 in back taxes pale in comparison – as well as cause at least
three other high-profile Obama cabinet appointees who are fellow tax cheats to blush).
This alone speaks volumes about Franken’s fractured character, not only in his fiscal
irresponsibility, but also his reckless disregard for the tax laws. |
Moreover, to declare Franken the winner, the court had to ignore the
numerous convictions of ACORN workers and officials who committed massive voter fraud in
at least 14 states in which they registered the names of convicted felons as well as the
deceased that also helped elect Barack Obama. To declare Franken the winner, the court had
to dismiss the disturbing role of convicted insider trader, leftist billionaire and fellow
nut job, George Soros, who has been one of Ritchie’s heftiest coffers.
What’s more, to declare Franken the winner, the court also had to ignore the
equally disturbing role of the ACORN-entrenched Minnesota Secretary of State Mark Ritchie
in the fraudulent recount, which gave 435 marginal votes to Franken and effectively stole
69 legitimate votes from Coleman. To declare Franken the winner, the court had to have
ultimately sold out completely to their demagogical friends and foes on the Left.
Judging by the bogus ruling and the elated reactions from his ardent media supporters,
Franken’s alter ego Stuart Smalley is the Left’s latest golden boy, who has
quickly become the ultimate caricature of Franken. That only leads to the simple
conclusion that anyone deluded enough to want Franken representing them has to be as loony
and out to lunch as he is. That being said, the Left has essentially morphed Franken into
a mirror of themselves, which honest Minnesotans will have to stomach for at least 5.5
years.
Ironically, Franken told Minnesota Public Radio "he wants to ask Sotomayor about
her views on campaign finance reform" (Associated Press, July 1, 2009). Franken wants
to get viewpoints from someone who, much like himself, hasn’t even been fully vetted
by the mainstream media to properly serve on the nation’s highest court? No surprise
there.
All in all, it takes more than a few positive affirmations from Franken’s alter
ego Stuart Smalley to have pulled this one off; it takes the sleazy, slimy maneuvers of a
politically and ideologically corrupt state court, as well as the Chicago-style, political
mechanizations of ACORN to foist the likes of Franken on the American psyche.
It was a feat that only Al Gore – who failed to steal the 2000 election – and
Dan Rather – who tried to sway Bush’s 2004 re-election in John Kerry’s
favor by knowingly using fabricated documents – could appreciate.
"Mr. Coleman didn’t lose the election," the Wall Street Journal
editors said (July 2, 2009) about Franken after he had figured out how to change the rules
by insisting that disqualified ballots in Franken-favored counties be recounted, while
Coleman wasn’t allowed that the same courtesy. "[Coleman] lost the fight to stop
the state canvassing board from changing the vote-counting rules after the fact."
In a June 25 editorial, the leftist editors of the Kansas City Star – who
have been clamoring for Franken to win since last November – declared that "the
excruciating waiting period" of the recount was "an absurdity" and a
"danger to democracy." But it would have been more of a danger to democracy if
all votes hadn’t been officially counted – something the Left always invariably
screams and whines about at election time. Only this time, the joke (a.k.a., Al Franken)
is on us.
What sets Franken apart from every other political hack is what made Al Gore stand out
in Washington: being the living, breathing personification of the serious mental disease
of liberalism, which should be professionally classified by the American Psychiatric
Association. Franken not only lives out this tragic disorder and mental malady; he also
defines it in spades – with the full support of an equally disturbed leftist media
culture that consistently, if not defiantly, lets Democrats off the hook, while
mercilessly savaging Republicans for doing the exact same acts of political, ethical and
moral mendacity. Like all leftists, Franken is completely incapable of telling the truth,
much less exposing it; otherwise he would have conceded last November’s election to
Coleman, the real winner.
But this shouldn’t be surprising. Given the angry, mean-spirited and caustic
demeanor of the Left’s media atmosphere, as well as most Democrats in Congress today,
Franken should fit right in with them. In fact, Franken will now be entering the U.S.
Senate as the perpetually tainted scumbag just as Democrat Christine Gregoire did when she
had stolen the Washington State governorship from the real winner, Republican Dino Rossi,
in 2004. According to the Wall Street Journal, Franken modeled his heist
after hers.
Even though the court has certified Stuart Smalley the winner in an election that had
Coleman clearly and undisputedly in the lead by 725 votes (and 215 votes after the first
canvass), the real Al Franken has become increasingly certifiable to the rest of us.
"Published originally at EtherZone.com :
republication allowed with this notice and hyperlink intact."
Doug Schmitz, a conservative columnist
and media analyst, holds a master's degree in journalism. He is a regular columnist
for Michnews.com; he's also been a guest columnist for Accuracy in Media (www.aim.org).
He is a regular columnist to Ether Zone.
Doug Schmitz can be reached at: ds_columns@yahoo.com
Published in the July 3, 2009 issue of Ether Zone.
Copyright © 1997 - 2009 Ether
Zone.
We invite your
comments on this article in our forum! |
